I was just looking at my New Year's resolutions and it dawned on me that it is a post, in and of, itself. That perhaps there is someone out there in my exact space that might benefit from my realizations. So I'm just going to put them out there as is…may they help you on your own journey…
1) Read a lot of inspiring stuff(one book or article about art, loving yourself, being happy….a week)…a lot. Let it sink in and mold me.
2) Try to be happy 88 percent of of the time. I want to let myself enjoy my life. (my personal favorite!)
3) Write my children's book. (I realize not all of you are into that sort of thing…but hell, why not write one just for fun?)
4) Keep working on my novel. Break it down into smaller, manageable chunks and make it a real job. Start working myself up to an hour a day…then two… (yes, I'm working on two books….what of it? Did you think I'm just a really lazy blogger? Well, yeah…but that's besides the point!)
5) Try to be more aware of the passage of time. Check my calendar everyday. Assimilate the day and month and really try to be present.
6) Slowly work myself into a 30 minute a day exercise routine for the first six months…and then by June, work up to an hour a day.
7) Really spend quality time with The Cute. Work out a routine of homework. Coloring, activities, and play with him…and only think about him while I'm doing it.
8) Stop multitasking. I want to do one thing at a time and be extremely good at that one thing.
9) Blog. A lot. (shut up…I'm working on it. 😛 It's about building momentum…not being perfect from the start….It's a muscle that I need to build up)
10) Stop beating myself up. Love myself unconditionally. Everyday. Compliment myself everyday and breathe. I want to smile at myself when I wake up. I want to accept myself wholly and stop thinking of myself as broken.
11) Stop being consumed by fear and worry. I think this will happen when I start loving myself, stop multitasking, stop rushing, and judging myself. My life is just beginning. I am a child being born with an endless lifetime to try and enjoy it. I am a beautiful new being as innocent and perfect as my son. My life is one worth savoring. (why eleven? Why the fuck not? 🙂 )
So there you have it…eleven goals that I am reaching for. Do you know why I wanted to post these? Why I'm so proud of them? Because for the first time, I made ones that I really want to do. Really want to accomplish. Not stuff I want to do to earn my own love…my own validation. They are because I already do love myself…and validate myself. For the first time in my life, I know that I can do these…I have faith in myself. I don't know when the switch tripped, or how…, but it did. And I hope it does for you. 2014 may be another difficult year. I might get sick, I might trip and stumble…but I've already won! I'm looking forward to spending so much time with myself and my family, chasing my dreams and loving my life.